All posts by Kandice Franklin

About Kandice Franklin

Hey everyone, Kandice here! I'm a single parent just trying to get through life. This blog documents all that I feel as a single parent and all the milestones that my child reaches. I also want to bring inspiration and encouragement into the world.

Chasing your dreams!

I just want to start off by saying that I plan to post a new blog once every week. I am learning to be more consistent and I figured why not start with the blog. Writing this blog has definitely given me a new sense of purpose.

I love the idea of chasing your dreams. It’s exciting but it also comes with a price. Personally, I am starting a path to become a millionaire. In my head, it sounds completely crazy and daring. I don’t consider myself to be the average person nor do I want to live the average lifestyle. It’s going to take a lot of hard work and dedication if I wanna make this happen.

Unfortunately, I have a horrible habit of laziness that can make this dream difficult to achieve. I am trying my absolute hardest to break this habit. I want my son to have better habits and a better understanding of life in general. Life can be difficult enough but how you overcome the obstacles is the important factor.

You also have to understand that everyone is not going to support you. This is the HARD lesson to learn. You have to learn to support and motivate yourself. Everyone is not going to be on your side and you need to be okay with that. If you want to be successful, haters come with the territory. A hater can be anybody, even those the closest to you. I’m tired of asking family and friends for help knowing they don’t want to help in the first place. It’s time for me to gain and maintain the lifestyle I want without the help from others.

I can no longer rely on help from others. My goals are not aligned with everyone else’s. I feel like I am set apart from the rest of the world and I have to start acting like it. I am confident in my abilities and I know I can accomplish my dreams!

An unexpected delivery: A birth story

It’s crazy how life works. My entire delivery was surprising and unexpected. I left work expecting an easy routine check up on my baby. Apparently, God has other plans that day. Since my due date was around the corner, well the following month to be exact, the doctor was doing movement tests on my son. I struggled with this test previously but today my son barely showed any movement. I didn’t think much of it at first because I assumed my son would start moving. After being tested by two different doctors, I was told to head to labor and delivery. The only thing on my mind was “When am I going to eat?” because I was starving. I didn’t hit me until I was actually in the delivery room filling out paperwork. My group text messages from work were every off the chain.

I couldn’t believe it was happening….

Delivery

The fear of Success

What am I afraid of? This is a question I often ask myself as I’m on my blogging journey. When I started this blog, I never really had a goal in mind. I just wanted to express my feelings in a way that’s comfortable for me. Sometime I feel like most of the world won’t care for my story but I also believe my story will impact someone’s life.

I woke up in the middle of the night and all I could think of was a song by Good Charlotte called “Life changes”. I’m reading through the lyrics and these words stuck out the most:

“You know that love changes

The pain, it rearranges

Best friends become strangers

Don’t you know that life changes 

So you get up and shake it off

Smile at everyone you meet

Put your best foot forward, chip on your shoulder

It’s like you can’t be beat

It’s like we can’t be beat”

I believe change is a vital part on the road to success and it’s nothing to be afraid of. If you aren’t willing to accept change in your life, how can you grown into the next picture of success? The crazy thing is, success is what I am afraid of. I don’t want success to change any values I have or that my son will develop. I’ve seen how success can negatively impact people but I have also seen the positive impact too. I’m just afraid success could change who I am as a person, so I am trying to find the best ways to be humble and happy in every situation. 

I was on the reader and I came across Ben Huberman’s article called “Three ways to take your website visitors behind the scenes”. After reading the article, I asked a question. I wanted to know how to show multiple sides of me without taking away from the main purpose of the blog. He gave me some helpful tips to help further develop my blog. I was actually pleasantly surprised when he replied to my comment. I definitely recommend checking out the discover section because you never know where your next great or inspiration will come from. Here is a link to the article if you wanna check it out.

Three ways to take your website visitors behind the scenes

Don’t be afraid to take a step toward your future because you don’t know what’s on the road ahead. That fear can stop you from achieving your greatest dreams. Just get out there and do it!

To my readers

Dear readers,

I am a single parent. My life is not easy. I struggle emotionally everyday. Not every parents situation is the same. If you child or children are fortunate enough to both parents active in their lives, I applaud you but I am also jealous. I never felt like I was ready to have a child. My son is almost a year now and I am still not fully ready for parenthood. I am not gonna lie, I had sex with one person for a couple of months when I got pregnant. I wasn’t smart about the situation because I was having unprotected sex, which could have been avoided, and that was very stupid. We weren’t in a relationship but I considered him a good time.

Although this is not the ideal situation for me and my son right now, I’ve learned a lot from this. I’ve had to develop a sense of survival. Just for information sake, my son’s dad is not active in his life. It seems like he doesn’t want to be involved and the way I see it, he is an adult who made the decision not to take care of his son.

I do experience a lot of emotions and at times I don’t understand how to deal with them. I have never been the type of person to express my feelings because I do have trust issues. It can be overwhelming and I often stress about everyday needs. I hate having to make ends meets, especially now that I am looking for employment. I am thankful for my friends and family who have stepped in to help me raise my son. Without them, my situation would be much worse then it is now.

By starting this blog, I have way to express myself and help develop my communication skills without feeling overly pressured. I hope this blog helps someone in the same situation. I want my readers to feel inspired, regardless of their situation, whether they are parents or not. I want to express positivity without being overly depressing. If there is anyone out there who feels like life can be hopeless at times, just know that your are more than capable of overcoming your problems. I haven’t accomplished all my dreams yet but now I have a reason to fight harder, push myself, and live life to the fullest. I want to encourage everyone out there to be the best version of you and always strive for your life’s desire. The journey isn’t easy but you never know what rewards await you at the finish line. Continue to be encouraged and know you can make it. Any downfall you experience is just a bigger reason to get back up and continue pushing forward.

YOU GOT THIS!!

A Re-Introduction: Who I am, Why I am here

Let me reintroduce myself. I want this blog to have some structure and a sense of purpose. I’ve always wanted to start a blog for so long but I was always afraid to take a leap of faith.

I did post an introduction for this blog about a month ago and I gave a general summary of what I wanted this blog to be.  I wasn’t satisfied with the post because I felt like it didn’t give the proper introduction of me or the blog itself.  I want my audience to understand my perspective. My experiences might help someone who feels exactly like I do.

My name is Kandice Franklin and I am a single parent. I just want to highlight different aspects of my life and the emotions that come with it. I often feel that sometimes being a single parent can be seen in a negative light and I want to change that. Through this blog, you will experience some of the highs and lows I face on an everyday basis. I never thought I would be in this position but I am thankful for this learning experience. I get the opportunity to prove how tough I am mentally and how that transfers to my parenting skills.

Thank you for taking the time out to read this and I appreciate you!

-Kandice Franklin

Consistency is my weakness

“There are no secrets to success. It is a result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure”

– Colin Powell

Hey Readers,

First off, I just wanna say I love my son with all my heart. He is the center of my world and I enjoy watching him grow up in front of my eyes. I love him so much that I want him to have the best life has to offer. In order for him to have the best, it starts with me. He pays attention to everything I am doing, whether he knows it or not. He craves love and attention from me; that’s what I strive for everyday. Our lives are a little bit difficult now that I am unemployed but I know I’ll get back on my feet soon. In order for me to do that, I have to face one of my BIGGEST weaknesses…CONSISTENCY!!!.

During my job hunting, I have had a lot of time to think. I think about different moments during my life, whether it be jobs or interactions with people. A lot of negative and toxic people are from my life and I am grateful to God for that. I do get distracted from my goals quite easily and that plays into my inconsistency issues. I hate that my son has to witness this; he doesn’t understand it yet. When he gets older, he will mimic my habits for the obvious fact that I am his primary parent.

I don’t the best way to overcome this and I would like some advice.

If you have any suggestions, please feel free to let me know!!

 

 

 

I’ve always known I would reach this point but I never knew I could feel like this.

I have to start over….and I hate it every time. My perspective on everything I’ve know growing up is changing as I continue to grow as an adult. My mother was a single parent but my father still had a presence in my life. Now I am in a similar situation but my son’s father has no presence.

Continue reading I’m unemployed

Financial Responsibility 

An investment in knowledge pays the best interest. –Benjamin Franklin

Dear Readers, 

I appreciate you for taking time out of your busy schedule to read my posts. I am not writing my post for any sympathy but understanding.

Being a parent is rewarding but also challenging. There is new information I am learning regarding my finances. Growing up, I was not taught how to budget or the importance of credit. I do admit that I have made mistakes with my money and it is hard to dig yourself out of a hole. 

I am determined to get myself more financially stable very soon. I hate to make excuses for my situation because there really isn’t one. For a single parent, time is not always on your side. I come home from work exhausted every single day and I barely have energy to do anything important. 

I have to stop the cycle IMMEDIATELY.  I am determined to make a positive future for my son and I. I will not quit and neither should you!!

That’s all I wanted to say. Have a wonderful day and know that I believe in you! 

Consciousness…

If I could predict the future, my life might not have as much meaning as it does now. Growing up, I really didn’t have much to worry about. Life seemed so much simpler than my actual reality. There is so much I wish I could’ve done differently if I knew better or learned it early on. 

I say this because I don’t want my child to make the same mistakes I did. I have been learning and researching the knowledge I missed out on just so I can teach my son. 

Right now, he is fast asleep. As I watch him sleep, he looks so innocent. He doesn’t understand the world is changing right before his eyes. As generations grow up, the struggle grows stronger. I don’t know if I can invest in my sons future. I am barely making it now, I can’t imagine what could happen when he gets ready for college. 

I am trying to teach myself extreme discipline with limited resources. The ability to better yourself is a conscious and time consuming task. Discipline and consistency are two things I don’t excel in and I’m finding that out the hard way. 

I know I’ll get better over time and maybe then I’ll be less overwhelmed. I just want the best for my son, that’s all I’ll ever need to be feel decent in my situation. 

Parenting is hard, I’m depressed..

“If you are ever unsure of the choices in life or scared of the future, look to me & I’ll help you” – God

I am sorry I haven’t posted a couple of days but I am not myself at the moment. This feeling is mostly coming from a situation at work. I was given a temporary position in an new department of my company and now this position is ending next week. I know some of you might be thinking “How is that depressing”. My old position was a piece of shit and I despised it with all soul. The thing is that this temporary position gave me peace of mind, if you can see it that way. I don’t mind a customer service position but sometimes your customers can push you over the edge. I enjoyed my time and it had plenty of benefits I liked.

Besides this situation at work, what sparked my depression was my thoughts on the future. I never wanted to be in a position where I worked long hours with no time for myself or my child. I often feel a corporate work environment is not for me. I do consider myself a free spirit who doesn’t want to be controlled by anyone. I’ve always wanted to work in an environment where I could do my own thing and still get paid. I don’t want to live a normal lifestyle and be like everyone else. I have always felt like I was set aside to be different and stand out. I have a lot of goals I would love to accomplish this year and I am determined to get them done.

One of my goals was actually to start a blog. I have always wanted to start one and once I got over my fear, this site was established. I want to gain more consistency and I know this will help out.

If anyone is willing, I would love for someone to comment on how you deal with depression or when you feel inadequate. What are some things you do to lift your spirits?

-Kandice